Forums » Help and Advice

I'm only falling apart on the inside.

  • April 28, 2015 4:18 PM EDT
    Im always the one with the answers. I go out of my way to help people. I'm nice to everyone I meet and I try not to discriminate. But I don't help myself. I'm not even nice to myself. I criticize myself everytime I look at myself . Yet I keep this hate and saddness deep down. I cover it with a fake smile. I help others while inside...I'm drowning...inside I'm screaming out for someone...someone to help me like I help everyone else. But who would every know that I go to sleep crying...because it turns out...I'm really good at lying.
  • April 28, 2015 4:50 PM EDT

    Oh hun, I totally can imagine how are you feeling :( -hugs-

    Tbh I feel almost the same way everyday of my life, in my past I went trought a lot of shits and I promissed myself not to let anyone ever feel the pain .I felt, like there are so much pain in world that..sometime sit makes me so sad and i want to help everyone....so I really do try to help and accept everyone always as I can, understand them before judge them...i try not to judge anyone tbh.....but at the same time I feel like I cant pull my own life and myself togeher...like im runnng around trying to be there for everyone...like a hamster in a wheel like runing and runing but when it come sto myself...sometimes I have these moments when i just cant pull myself together and hate myself so much that  cant face myself in mirror...and i feel just really alone...like...I have nobody who would actually care for me...so I can imagine how you may feel -BIG HUGZ-

    Well Im visiting therapist because of this...and well what she have told be is that I have to learn to love and accept myself..and think about myself too instead of other people...and well some of my friends have told me the same thing...and im saying this to you, Im sure you are wonderful person, very sweet, caring and beautiful...and you want people around you to be happy....and I also believe taht you want to feel happy to...and you deserve to be happy...try to everyday write down 5 things that you like about yourself, 5 good things that have happened that day, and 5 things that you are thankful taht day...and read them in the end of the week....well that might help you realize how great person you are...:3

  • April 28, 2015 4:52 PM EDT

    P.S if u ever feel down feel free to msg me :3

  • April 28, 2015 5:13 PM EDT
    Thanks darlin
  • April 28, 2015 9:11 PM EDT

    im sorry hun, i wish i could help you... *cuddles you aggressively* just take a deep breath and put your favourite music and please please please pleeeeaaaaseee reach out me, id love to help youuuuuu i hope thigns get even a little better for you, sorry i feel sorta brain dead atm so this is less than helpfull <3

     

    ~red

  • April 28, 2015 10:30 PM EDT
    -huggles back- ty dear. And just the kindness and understanding helps.
  • April 30, 2015 6:24 AM EDT

    Eh? is that so humbug?

      I feel you... hun! totally. It's like being busy building homes... while losing briks from your own. you know? 

    So talk to me if you want to. I'm so glad I'm not the only one to think so. :)

    • 97 posts
    May 4, 2015 11:26 PM EDT

    Its hard to take our own advice sometimes. Just think of what you would suggest to one of your friends, and that is what you should do. Everyone needs someone to talk to at times, and the opportunity to share feelings and feel vulnerable. No one should have to take the burden of everyone elses problems without addressing their own. Anyways, hope you are feeling better. =].

    • 23 posts
    January 20, 2016 4:36 PM EST

    Based on the small amount you have said, I'm nearly certain you are BPD.  DBT might help, or it might not.  If you've tried antidepressants and they don't work, try sunifiram.  Supplement it with L-theanine and ALCAR.


    This post was edited by AthenaDaze at January 20, 2016 4:36 PM EST
    • 8 posts
    January 28, 2016 6:59 PM EST

    Professional help is always an option, one thing though is that you'll need to not only learn to stop lying to others (especially if you're seeing someone for it), but as well as to stop lying to yourself. Admiting things to oneself can be quite difficult but can be done, admiting it to others is probably even more difficult but can be done slowly and to the right people, people who are willing and let alone wanting to listen.

  • April 23, 2016 7:40 PM EDT

    Well , you are here telling us the truth , i think it's a really big step :)  

     

    I'm starting to like this site ! everyone is honest here and that's something you can't find everywhere these days.

    • 11 posts
    May 6, 2016 10:19 AM EDT
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  • March 4, 2017 10:55 AM EST

    you can always talk to me if you want too.I am too nice for anyone good so I know how you feel